The Story of St. Urho Savumäki

 

Version Five ‑ February 2001                                                                                                                 Return to Home Page or Finnish Humor Listing

Created by Sulo Havumäki and embellished by Elmer Mattila and his colleagues.

(D Elmer Mattila, Louise Mattila, Parke Kunkle, and Gary Phillips)

 

Vaming: If u rie sellit dis ting, vee take after u vit 2‑piip sotgun.

 

 

[A] The Finns originally inhabited central Europe where they fought with large ape‑like creatures. After many fights, the Finns moved north to what is now modem Finland. Early history is recalled in this epic song.

Agrazing Race (to Amazing Grace)

[Play thru once, then sing 4 verses; Key=Fl

 

[I) The Finnish race was fighting apes                           [3] They settled in and built their homes

In ancient days of old                                                     With saunas on the side

They walked and grazed, as they headed                       The Finns had finally found a home

north                                                                               With dignity and pride.

And left the land below.                                                                        1

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            [4] When they had lived ten thousand years

[2] Agrazing race, how lost they were                            The stage was finally set

A‑moving from the apes                                                  For Urho's saga to unfold

They once were lost, but now have found                       And that's why we have met!

The land that's full of grapes.

 

 

 

[B] Who is Urho Savumäki? What is he all about? What is his story?

 

Superstar

[Play twice; Sing twice; Play twice; Key=Cl

 

 [1] U‑r‑ho Sa‑vu‑mä‑ki  

Who are you? What are you all about?

 

[2] U‑r‑ho, Sa‑vu‑mä‑ki

Who are you? What are you all about?

 

 

[C] What is all this nonsense about St. Urho? Why is this weird party in the _______, or even at all? Well, brace yourselves, for you are about to find out what the story of St. Urho is really all about.

 

I

 

[Intro; Sing; Play; Sing; Key=Gl

 

I Love To Tell The Story (2 times)

 

I love to tell the sto‑ry of how the grapes were saved,

Of Urho and his sauna‑, o‑‑‑of Urho and his cave.

 I love to tell the story, be‑cause I know tis true;

 It satisfies my longings as nothing else can do.

 I love to tell the story, twill be my theme in glory

To tell the old, old story of Urho and dose hoppers.

 

[D   A very long time ago, before the glaciers, the weather was very warm in Finland and wild grapes grew all over the countryside. As you can see this was a long, long time ago and I can feet a song coming on.

 

A Long Time Ago

 

[Play; Sing; Sing; Play; Key=Cl

A long time ago when the earth was green,

There were more kinds of grapes then you've ever seen.

 And they'd sit in the sun while the Finns were having fun.

 But beware the plague of grasshoppers had begun.

There were green alligators and long necked geese.

 Hump backed camels and chimpanzees.

 Cats and rats and elephants but like a brown plopper,

 The ugliest of all was the green grasshopper.

 

 

[E]      The Finns, being very industrious, began to cultivate these grapes and developed some superb varieties. Some of these were later planted all over Europe, especially in France and Italy. This was done by JOHNNY GRAPE SEED, known in Finland as JUSSI VIINI‑RYPÄLÄN‑KIVI. He did this while accompanying the Finnish trading missions to Egypt. They were hauling rock statues into the Nile region and building the Temples of Karnak out of Finnish Granite. This Jussi Grape Seed was very popular in Finland and the people back home would sing of his returning.

 

When Jussi (Johnny) Comes Marching Home

 

[Sing; Play Sing; Key=G (Em)]

 

When Jussi comes marching home again, Hur‑rah! Hur‑rah!

We’ll give him a hearty welcome then, Hur‑rah! Hur‑rah!

The men will cheer, and the boys will shout. The ladies they will all turn out,

And we'll all get drunk when Jussi comes marching home.

 

[F]      The Finns found grape picking a very tedious chore, so they tried several things to make it less boring. First, they tried work songs like this.

 

Bringing In The Grapes

 

[Sing; Sing; Play; Key=Gl

 

Bringing in the grapes, bringing in the grapes.

We shall come re‑joicing, bringing in the grapes.

 

2

[G]      The grape pickers union decided to make a game of it. Large crocks were placed at the ends of each field. The pickers chose two teams. Teammates would pick grapes, toss them to one another, and then throw them into their opponent’s crock. This is how basketball was invented by the Finns. The team that filled their opponent's crock first won the game. The game rules had the losers eating the contents of the crocks. These games got quite exciting and led to the first cheerleaders and the first recorded fight song.

 

Minnesota Rouser

 

[Play; Sing; Sing; Play; Key=Gl

 

Fin‑nish pic‑kers hats off thee

To their co‑lors true they shall e‑ver be‑e

Green and pur‑ple the'll always be.

Ca‑ta‑ba and con‑cord blue.

Mus‑ca‑tel and Rip‑ple too.

Rah for fer‑men‑ted grapes.

 

[H]      With the Finns being such hard workers, the crocks got filled up too fast and the game didn't last long. So, they placed grape stompers in the crocks and called them goalies.  These goalies were usually large square‑headed Finns with large wide feet. Now, as you can see with this goalie business that this was the beginning of hockey, and we now have the goalie song.

 

Tolvo The Square Headed Finn

(The Band Played On)

 

[Sing; Sing; Play; Key=Gl

 

Toivo the square headed Finn he would stomp in the crocks all day.

He'd stomp with his wide feet and big purple toes and the gang played on.

But his brain got so loaded it nearly ex‑ploded.

The poor boy was filled with alarm.

He'd ne'er leave the crock with the grape juice so hot.

And the gang played on.

 

[11      One day while the Finns were playing grape hockey some kibitzers from the west, known as Swedes came along. The Swedes angered the Finns because they were eating the Finns right out of their game. This episode of Finnish history has been immortalized in this traditional folk song.

 

3

 

Purple Grapes

(Goober Peas)

 

[Sing; Sing; Play]

 

Verse:

Playing hockey wildly on a summer day.

Finns with their team‑mates passing time a‑way.

Stomping in the arbor, not a Finn es‑capes.

Goodness how de‑licious, eating purple grapes.

 

 Chorus:

Grapes, grapes, grapes, grapes. Eating purple grapes.

Goodness how de‑licious, eating purple grapes.

 

Verse:

Just before the game starts, there's an awful row. (ra‑oh)

Someone s eatin' our grape crop, we hear their chompin' now.

They turn 'round in wonder and just about go ape.

'Cause there's the Swede militia eating purple grapes.

 

Chorus:

Grapes, grapes, grapes, grapes. Eating purple grapes.

Goodness how de‑licious, eating purple grapes.

 

Chorus again:

Grapes, grapes, grapes, grapes. Eating purple grapes.

Goodness how de‑licious, eating purple grapes.

 

[J] So the Finns hollered at the Swedes and the Swedes threw rocks at the Finns. And one thing a Finn can't stand, is a rock throwing Swede, especially if he/she does it like this.

 

Rock Around The Clock

 

[Sing; Sing; Play; Play; Key=Cl

 

1‑2‑3 O'Clock, 4 O'Clock rock

5‑6‑7 O'Clock, 8 O'Clock rock

9‑ 10‑11 O'Clock, 12 O'Clock rock

We’re gonna rock around the clock tonight.

 

Put your glad rags on and join me hon.

We'll have some fun when the clock strikes one.

We're gonna rock around the clock tonight.

We're gonna rock, rock, rock til broad daylight.

We're gonna rock, gonna rock around the clock tonight.

 

When the clock strikes 12, 1 and 2

I'll be going strong and so will you.

We’re gonna rock around the clock tonight.

We’re gonna rock, rock, rock til broad daylight.

We’re gonna rock, gonna rock around the clock tonight.

 

[K]     Of course, the Finns took after dose Swedes right‑a‑vay now. They chased them across Sweden and Norway, through Iceland and over Greenland into North America. That is how the Finns discovered America.

 

4

America

 

[Intro; Sing; Sing; Play; Play; Key=Cl

 

America, America Urho shed his grace on thee.

And crown Thy good with brotherhood

 From sea to shining sea.

 

[L] The chase and then getting back to the vineyards took several weeks. With the crocks full and sitting in the sun for that time the contents were considerably changed. But, rules are rules. The losers still had to eat the contents of the crocks. After awhile the losers were having such a good time that they didn't care about losing ‑or anything. It wasn't long before each family had its own crocks. They would play some grape hockey and chase Swedes for a few weeks and then come home singing.

 

Show Me The Way To Go Home

 

[Sing; Sing; Play; Key‑‑G]

 

Show me the way to go home,

Cause I'm tired and I don't know where I'm at.

I've been chasing Swedes for a month or two,

But that’s enough of that.

When I find that crock of mine,

I hope it's filled with wine.

Then you'll surely hear me singing my song,

I'll be glad to be home a‑gain soon.

 

[M]     But, alas, one day the grasshoppers came. There were millions of them. Everywhere! They ate everything in sight.

 

Chomp, Chomp, Chomp The Grapes

(Row, Row, Row Your Boat)

 

[Sing; Sing; Play; Play; Key=C]

 

Chomp, chomp, chomp the grapes

Juice runs down their chin.

Hastily, wastefully, speedily, greedily

Hoppers eat to win.

 

[N]     They ate the grapes, the figs, the coconuts, and the bananas. They even began to chomp on the saunas.

 

Battle Hymn of the Hoppers

(Battle Hymn of the Republic)

[Sing; Sing; Play; Key=G]

 

Mine ears have heard the chomping of the last big plague of hoppers.

Dey are swarming thru. the vineyards and der wading thru the ploppers.

Dey can eat the grapes so fast and dey are the size of whoppers.

Dey just keep chomping on.

Sorry sorry what's it to ja;

Hopper, hopper we won't fool ja.

The Finns are going to put it to you.

You bit off more than you can chew.

 

[01     Well, something had to be done and done quickly; before the Finns were eaten out of house and sauna. They tried to kill them with clubs and axes, and chain saws, but they could not keep up with the invading hoppers.

 

5

Killing Nasty Hoppers

(Put Another Nickel In ‑ Music! Music! Music!)

[Play; Sing; Sing; Play; Key=F]

Strike another hopper down,

Even if he has a frown.

All I want is eating grapes and killing nasty hoppers.

I'd do anything for grapes,

Anything for nice, round shapes.

All I want is eating grapes and killing nasty hoppers.

 

Hoppers, those nasty hoppers.

The nicest part of any merry spree

Is when those grapes are close to me.

 

So Strike another hopper down,

Even if he's old and brown

All I want is eating grapes and no more nasty hoppers.

 

[P]      All the wise men of Finland were called together for a council. There were three of them Toivo, Eino, and Sulo.

 

Three Vise Finns

(Three Blind Mice)

[Sing; Sing; Play; Key=C]

Three vise Finns. Three vise Finns.

Toivo, Eino Sulo. Toivo, Eino, Sulo

Dey all went after that Urho poy.

To get his help to knock grasshoppers dead.

Did ever you see such a sight in your life,

As three vise Finns.

 

[Q]     They were really scratchin their heads, "vot to do? vot to do?" They tried all kinds of stuff‑, 6‑12, DDT, OFF, DEEPWOODS. Nothing made a dent in the grasshopper infestation. They finally concluded that they would have to find someone special to help, like St. Urho Savumäki. Urho was his first name, Savuädki was his last name and it means smoking hill. He got his name from living on a volcanic mountain. There is even a song about it.

 

On Top Of Old Smokey

 

[Play; Sing; Sing; Play; Key=Cl

On top of old smo‑key, lived Urho the Saint.

The patron of Finland, old wizend and quaint.

On top of old smokey, in a sauna so hot,

Sits Ur‑ho poi‑kaa, smoking some pot.

 

JR]      Vat dis council business means to a Finn is that you sit in a hot sauna for a couple of hours and talk business in between beating one self and each other with bunches of birch boughs.

 

6

 

                                                               Hosauna (from Jesus Christ Super Star)

[Play; Sing; Sing; Key=Gl

                                                   Hey sauna, Ho sauna, Sauna, sauna ho

                                                   Sauna. Hey sauna ho, sauna.

                                                   Hey Ur‑ho, Ur‑ho, You're all right by me.

                                                   Kill dose hoppers really quick Ur‑ho poy'

 

[S]        This Urho poy was a real sauna freak. He has his sauna sitting over a hot lava flow so that it would always be hot and save energy too. The surrounding hillside was covered with very beautiful spruce trees.

 

0 Kuusi Puu

(Oh Christmas Tree)

 

[Sing; Sing; Play; Key=Fl

 

Oh kuusi puu, Oh kuusi puu; How lovely are your branches.

Oh kuusi puu, Oh kuusi puu; How much your green enhances.

The cave where Urho dwells; In dat volcano hot as hell.

Oh kuusi puu, Oh kuusi puu; Your beauty sure entrances.

 

[T]  Then dose 3 vise guys told Urho of the hopper problem down in the valley; Toivo with his great oration, Sulo with his beautiful kantele music, and Eino with his accordion, singing this beautiful song:

 

Sunrise, Sunset

(from Fiddler on the Roof)

[Play; Sing; Sing; Play tag; Key=G (Em)]

Is this the little grape I carried?

Is this the little vine at play?

I don't remember growing riper. When did they?

When did she drop off all her leaves?

When did he fall onto the ground?

Wasn't it yesterday when vines did abound.

 

Sunrise, sunset; Sunrise, sunset.

Slowly flow the days.

Seedlings turn over night to chewed plants.

Eaten up even as we gaze.

 

Is this why Eino went to college?

Is this why Toivo studied too?

They don't remember growing smarter. How about you?

Why do you listen to this story?

Just because Eino bought the beer?

But back to the story because Urho poy ist near.

 

Sunrise, sunset; Sunrise, sunset.

Slowly flow the days.

Seedlings turn over night to chewed plants.

Eaten up even as we gaze.

 

 

 

 

 

7

 

[U]      St Urho said he would see vat he could do. After 3 days and 3 nights of meditation in his cave that famous chant was heard:

 

Hei–nä si-rk-ka, Hei–nä si-rk‑ka, mene täältä hii‑teen!

 

Translated, this means:

"Grasshopper, grasshopper, get the hell out of here."

After a few hours of chanting, a great cloud of purple smoke rolled out from the top of the Savumäki (smoke hill) and the smoke rolled down into the valleys and killed dose hoppers dead. St. Urho had saved the day.

 

Urho, Superstar

 

[Sing; Sing; Play; Key=Cl

U‑r‑ho, Sa‑vu‑mä‑ki.

Who are you? What are you all about?

U‑r‑ho, Sa‑vu‑mä‑ki.

Do you think you're what they say you are?

 

[VI      In memory of this impressive event, this miracle, Finnish people celebrate March 16, April 1, May 9, and most all other days of the year. The women dress in royal purple and gather by the lake shores to chant and sing while the men dress in Nile green and go up on the hills and dance. When the singing and chanting stops, they all fall down and kick their feet in the air like dying grasshoppers. The celebration then goes on for several days with singing and dancing polkas and schottisches and drinking grape juice, beer, vodka, aquaveet, and black Russians in varying sequences.

 

Ode To Saint Urho

(Ballad of Davy Crockett)

[Sing it all the way thru; Key=Gl

 

Verse I                                     He sase out the hop‑pers as pig as pirds.

                                                Nef‑fer be‑fore haff I hurd tose vurds.

                                                He real‑ly told dose pugs of kreen.

                                                Paf‑fest Finn dat I haf ef‑fer seen.

 

Chorus                                     Hay‑nä, hay‑nä sirk‑ka, Me‑ne täältä hii‑teen.

Chorus instrumental

Verse 2                                    Some celebrate for St. Pat und his nakes

                                                Putt Ur‑ho poi‑ka has got vot it takes.

                                                He got strong from vee‑li‑a sour,

                                                Ate kala‑moi‑ja‑kaa ef‑fe‑ry hour.

 

Chorus                                     Ur‑ho, Sa‑vu‑mä‑ki. Ur‑ho ist the poy for me.

Chorus instrumental

Verse 3                                    Tats vhy dat guy could sase dose peetles.

                                                Vat grew as tick as chack pine needles.

                                                Let's give a cheer in hour pest vay

                                                On the 16th of March, St. U‑r‑hos Day

.

Chorus                                     Hay‑nä, hay‑nä sirk‑ka, Me‑ne tääl‑tä hii‑teen.

Chorus                                     Ur‑ho, Sa‑vu‑mä‑ki. Ur‑ho ist the poy for me.

Chorus instrumental

                                                                            

 

Fin(n)is

 

8

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